Power Of Pain by Star711

#24 Power Of Pain

This is a poem I wrote when I first was diagnosed with Social Anxiety. It was a way for me to look for hope and keep trying.

It's about how I would feel everyday.

This poem originally was published in Poems on Life

Power Of Pain

by Star711

I sat alone another day.
The world was moving all around me,
but it seemed as if my life was in a standstill.
The doctors say its anxiety.
Everyone thinks anxiety means nervousness or fear,
but it is deeper than that.
Anxiety holds you prisoner.
You can't leave your house.

Ding
Dong
Ding
Dong

The doorbell rings but I can't answer.
There is too much fear inside.
You can't answer the phone.

Ring
Ring
Ring

"Telephone for you!" my family yells. I
tell them to say that I will call back, but I won't.
You can't eat.

Chomp
Bite
Chew

No, not me. The anxiety
even controls that. All the pain rushes back up with
every little thing I eat.
You can't go out.

Step
Step
Step

Everyone walking around me, but I can't move, the
apprehension paralyzes me.
Everyone says, "Be brave. You can do it. You'll make it out of this."
But sometimes I wonder if I will.
I try to combat it all, but if I attempt to do anything,
it all starts over again.

Thump
Thump
Thump

My heart beats faster and faster.
I can feel it in my chest.

Beads of sweat
Racing
Falling
Running down my forehead.
All the thoughts swarm in my brain.
The fear picks up.
It is unbearable.
I'm so frightened, but I don't know what of.
The paranoia sweeps over my body like a giant wave.
Every day I have to fight what seems to be a losing battle.
But then . . . I look outside.
I see the colors.
I see the life.
I see spirit.
I know I can do this.

Hope
Pray
Win

48 Visitor Comments (from the Voting form)

karen

I liked this poem. its touching, and it shows how hard this persons life is. i read alot of poems but not many like this one. karen
victoria

you are a deep person i cry for the pain
Sheila

I like it very much! the story flows and i can relate my self to every word that was written on it. I'm glad you have given such a contribution like this. I hope to be a writer in the future, doesnt know yet though if its the right path for me. Well, i'm still a junior in High school. as what everyone else says i still got time but as days pass, i feel i'm losing a time to find my self. I'm still lost, dont know what path should i travel to. IS believing myself enough to make me success? or is there any other things that lies on it that i should know. No matter, hope i'll found my light so that i can run my hills and not stock in here not knowing what to do.
Saka

pain couldn't have felt
Brittany

As I read through the story, you could really picture it in your mind. You did a good job on writing the poem. Keep it up!
judi

how my gosh! she put MY fellings into words like i never could. this is such a true poem and very well written. she is a very good author. i would love to se more on the subject.
bobbie

wow this was so touching and it hit the beauty of feelings. thanks
MERCEDES

THIS IS A REALLY GOOD POEMS
britt

wow amazing i like it alot
mandye

i have a certain fear of the dark. because of that, i can relate to some of the things u were speaking about. this poem has really good imagery.
Teresa

I loved your poem. I just turned 15 a few months ago and I know how you feel. Unfourtunatley, I have have been dealing with anxiety for a few years now. To tell you the truth, it's a few years too long. Latley I have lost all my friends because of my anxiety. I get random anxiety attacks and have to leave where ever I am. Everything in this poem, I have felt.
Joan

I have experienced anxiety in the past, reading this was like a source of inspiration and motivation to anyone who ever suffered from this in the past or in the future. Beautiful
charlene

touched me so much, just exactly how i feel, word for word, your mind is a very powerfull thing,,,, to think of been scared of going out, of not eating, of not wanting to see or talk to anybody, gets you so so angry, theres no reason, no answers, its true nobody seems to understand, its so easy for them to judge, your living alone in a world that nobody understands.
roxanne

this poem touch base with me. i am bipolar and i feel like that every day of my life , the struggle
linda

I was very touched by this poem. Doctor telling me I have anxiety, depression and biplolar me not wanting to believe it. Yet, feeling it daily. I sink deep and rise quickly. Then there are times I dont answer the phone or the door. Many many times I have fooled many many people acting as if everything is just perfect. Thank you for the feelings that I feel and have felt through the years put into wordws that say so much.
Deseita

This piece of work to me is very deep and change the way you view things. The work can also make you realize that god can give you the answer to everything
judy

I HAVE BEEN IN THE SAME POSITION FOR A WHILE.
emily

i love this poem because its how i feel most of the time. its great. and i hope you can do what you want to one day. hopefully that day is tomorrow! i love your poem.
eli

wow,i'm not a poet. but to my knowledge this poem was well written. the reason why it touched me so is because this feeling that you're expressing and the doctors call anxiety to me it sounds much like what i have felt when i feel overcome with depression. i never went to a doctor to be dianosed but i know that is what i have have every so often. and trust me i hate it. just the thought of it makes me shiver. you wonder how i get rid of it? i pray alot and believe me it helps it just goes away. keep writting you writting distracts your mind. and never, never give in.
virginia

i think this poem shows a lot of your feeling i wish i could do one to butb i wouldnt no where to start
Mfon

Thanks for your poem. Sometimes anxiety can make us lost our balance. Your poem is quiet encouraging, I think that's a word of advice to some of us surfering from anxiety.
Angel

WOW. I know how you feel. I suffer from Bipolar Disorder and every word you wrote is true. But there is a rainbow at the end of this black tunnel. I know there is!
Laurie

Very touching . would like to read where you are now . emotionally.
Lacey

It's sad to say but comforting toi read things like this so we all don't feel alone every day. I too suffer from this since I've been 18 and am now 26 i can say it's gotten better but to some people it's not saying much, I hope we all get better and things like writing about it can help, u might want to try the panic program a 12 week program online or u can print it, look panicprogram. com, or on google panic program, thanks best wishes
maricar

i feel the same way. and i understand how u are feeling.
melissa

i think this poem is really close to alote of peoples hearts cause my best friend suffers from anxiety attacks and this poem really helped her to see that she isn't alone.
Jamie

its a real story of an inside pain that is hard to find ways to express
Heather

this poems , was GREAT , i feel if has you were talking about, i sent this to a friend to let her understand , what i was goin though.
Tash

i thought this was a great poem, and its made me realise i bad it must be for you, that poem was excellent! well odnt :D
Karri

You are definitely a strong soul and a inspiration to all! Good luck in all endeavours.
Ashley

great!
Cheryl

This poem was terrific in its simplicity and you have a talent for transferring your feelings by means of printed words. I had fellow feeling with you, as I have also suffered social anxiety along with a host of other pysch diagnosis's. I am glad that you have hope and can view a good future. Some with this disease have a hard time ever getting there.
gaurav

good!
courtney

Thank you so much for writing this poem! This is exactly how I feel. I cry all the time. I have depression and generalized anxiety disorder. Now I know I am not the only one out there! God Bless
Teresa

Star771, Your poem says alot about how difficult dealing with social anxiety realy interfears with daily life. So many people just don't understand how very real this desease (social anxiety) is, and that it's not just someting that you can make go away. Thank You for your words. they are the words of my life. im sorry that they are also a part of your life. Your not alone Star771
Ali

Wonderful writing. I myself suffered from this incredibly confining illness. I lost so much of my life to it. I feel now that I'm winning the battle. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts.
savio

great peom. it was marrvelous. dont let the wound of the past now hurt your future. good luck.
kara

I really like this because it tells alot about my life, and relates to it.
Jose

This poem was really good. As a fellow poem writer I felt what you were trying to say.
Havva

I cryed. And smiled. Thank You! (",) x
Sera

sorrow that you live with all the heavies you describe. joy that you have found a powerful voice to share your inner light. thank you for the insporation!
Will

Great poem,I am in a relationsip with a wonderful person that suffers a great deal with social anxiety. I try to help him in every way possible but I don't think much helps. This has helped me understand his pain. Now I think He is leaving and I don't now what to do.
sagal

all ur poems are marvalouse wish u a good luck
trish

I got goosebumps when I read this poem. I feel this way all of the time. Sometimes I can't beleive I made it this far. Sometimes I feel like I need tto run from everyone, and I don't know how. No matter how many people say they have it ,I still feel scared to tell anyone. Hang in there, alot of us feel the same. I have so much social anxiety(ptsd) I can hardly be around anyone but my kids. If I do, I get sweaty hands, can't breathe,and feel trapped. I hate the dr. office., or anywhere I am seen.
jackie

I rally enjoyed this poem it's very inspirational, there's a in place in my heart for this poem Sincerely Jackie
curly

IT's a great poem.I really enjoy reading it. That's how i feel most of the time,it's difficult when you feel that way. well, I will keep reading your poems i find them very interesting...
Daniel

He told about being a prisoner trapped by this illness. But we all are prisoners, aren't we? Trapped by our egoism, our fear to talk about our and other's problems. The trap keeps os from understanding. The trap is in all of us!
georgina

this is tremendous. I do so hope you feel better now and all this is in the past. Best wishes.

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#24 Power Of Pain

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