Well, this is obviously about my father. I prefer to call him "Father". The reason for this is that a father is one who provides for his child. A dad is one who treats his child with love, respect and kindness. I seldom receive that from him - Therefore, he is my father. Also, I've always felt that I've been in the shadow of my little sister. She's pretty, popular, smart, and athletic. I am none of these. He treats her like a princess and me like Cinderella. I feel like he never wanted me to be born.
This poem originally was published in Poems on Life - Teen Poems about Life
Ode To The Man I Sometimes Call Dad
I lie awake at night And converse with the darkness. We discuss many things, The blackness and I. We had an interesting conversation The other night. I have been wondering lately What it would be like To be someone other than me. If I were more like her, Would you still Hate me? If I weren't like me, Would you realize that you produced two? Could you know that we are equal, Although not the same? Could you be that open-minded? Doubtful. Is it possible for you to see me As the woman I've become, Rather than the girl You once knew? I've overcome many obstacles, Climbed many mountains, Achieved many dreams; But still you refuse to respect me. You tell me that I'm worthless, That I won't amount to much. You call me a loser I Cannot take it any longer! I will fight back this time. But am I Strong enough To fight that which makes me weak? No. I will continue to let you belittle me And treat me like a fool, Like I am merely a stepping stone On your path of destruction. You tell me to respect you But how can I respect a man Who doesn't respect himself? I can't honor and obey you Like a true DAD should be treated. Because in these past seventeen years, You have never been a "Dad" to me. You are only my guardian, my provider - Not my Dad. You've provided me with the basics, What I need now is for you to help me; Love, Laugh, be Free, Live every moment to the Fullest. Until you can fulfil that need, I will let the darkness Heal my wounded soul, Because you never learned how. |
©
1999
Jessie Duebler
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39 Visitor Comments (from the Voting form)
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KerryThat was a fantastic poem, congrats! I know exactly how you are feelng, my parents are divorced and ever since my dad has been with this new chick i feel like i mean absolutely nothing to him. She doesn't like me at all and has a daughter who thinks she is the best thing since sliced bread. My dad is always putting me down and telling me that im useless and a good for nothing it really hurts and its sometimes weird to see that im not the only person that has problems with my 'father'. I just want to tell you that you gota keep strong and don't ket people walk over, be yourself and never let life get you down! BE STRONG JESSIE:-)
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JessicaThis describes my father perfectly. I'm glad I'm not alone.
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HunterThe day I read this poem I had just got into n argument with my dad. I sent it to him and wrote at the bottom please don't let this sum up our lives. right now i know he hasn't read yet because he's sitting right here, but i'm hopeful that it'll have response and an impact. Thank you for this poem!
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REBECCAWOW, I REALLY LIKE YOUR POEM. I ALSO BELIEVE THAT A FATHER IS ONLY A MAN WHO HELPED MAKE A BABY BUT A DAD IS A MAN WHO LOVES N TAKES CARE OF A CHILD. KEEP ON WRITING
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dianaJessie I know how it feeles I'm 18 and i live with my mom and dad but my dad is a very mean,bitter person and every day of my life for the last 2 years have been a living hell holle for me. :-D
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Yumikoi'll will give this poem the highest vote because it really touched me!
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JessicaThis was a wonderful poem. I was suprised how someone could feel the exact same feelings that I am.
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NicoleI loved this. I could really relate. When I read the description it almost brought tears to my eyes. "A huge difference between being a father and a "Dad". I'm 14 currently, 15 in Januaury and I can never once remember my father being my "Dad". Anyways, thanks for sharing with me and millions of other people here. Be strong, always.
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claudiathis is a very good poem because it reminds me of my brother in jail for 8 years.
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YaniYou Go Girl! I definitely feel every word that is in this poem you have stole my thoughts right from me! You have a beautiful spirit. Yani
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mariannathis poem is exactly what i have wanted to say for so long, yet could never express. this poem express those feelings.
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KristinaJessie, I know how you feel; perhaps sperm donor would be better than father? That's how it is in my case. Good luck with that wounded soul of yours, I'm 17, & it still hasn't healed. K
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Kortniethat poem rocked! i feel the same exact way with my father and all. your poem summed up my feelings so well, when i try to write a poem about that i just cant cuz i get so mad and emotional it turns into a mess of cuss words LOL you are very talented :)
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DANIKKAWow this is probably the best poem I haveread on here yet. I would never call my father dad. He remains my sperm donor. Sometimes, father. So I can relate. Thank you.
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BlueNice but a sad poem.
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KaccandraThis poem really touched my heart. I didn't think anyone felt the sameway I do until I read your poem, It's nice to know that I a not alone.
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aksi liked this poem because it has touched my heart, my thoughtsand my life on the whole as a teenager. its really hurting when parents compare and differentiate.
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SarahJessie, I absolutely LoVe your poem. Its so powerful and touching. For so long I have felt the same way as you and never got the courage to express my feelings bout it. You have that courage to step it up and really tell it like it is. I appreciate your work so much. It explains my feelings from head to toe. right on the nail. Its an excellent poem and I wish I had enough courage to write about those types of things and just tell them to the public. I do it alone and in my own little notebook where no one can see. You are an amazing poet and I adore your poem. GREAT WORK!
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Mariexctly how I feel.
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DaylineVery nice poem, sad one too. Good luckand Thank You.
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michaeli cried and cried I am a father and I think I have done the same thing
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emileejessie i absolutly love the poem i am using it to do a poem assigment in my speech class. We had to find a poem to reflect our lifes and this one made me cry when i read it because its so close to perfect in desribing mine my story is only different in the fact that mine is a big brother I hope you learn to cope with the pain as i have and i know sometimes it may seem hard but the darkness can heal a wounded soul aventually and what hurts us omnly makes us stronger and them weaker. Just remember it is his lose in life not yours because you dont need someone like him.
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JenniferThis poem reminded me of my brother. and I'm really close to him. so he tells me these exact same things. I Love this poem. it's GREAT!
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jenI have two older sisters and my mother seems to favor them, treat them like there perfect although i see them as screw-ups she treats me like as if i didnt even matter. I wish i was never born when i have to hear all the harsh things she always says to me. She acts as if nothing i do will ever please her no matter how hard i try, i would give anything to hear her say for the very first time that she is proud of me. prehaps she hates me beacause when i was born she almost died.
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courtneyI love your poem. It had a total affect on me. Im living with that problem also so i no where you are coming from.
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chrismy g/f is going threw the same thing great poem i love to right and seeing others who write makes me feel less like an outcast when i write everyone keep it up!
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AngelI loved your poem. I understand it word for word. See my father is the same way, but I have a younger brother and sister and also a older one of each I am in the middle and feel the same way you do. Be strong and remember-"you are what YOU make of your self"
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aI love this poem, it's really sad but I can relate to it because my mom is never nice to me. She kept on telling me I was fat and that I was horrible and inconsiderate. When I tried to talk to her she would ignore me and I gave up. Then she got mad at me coz i never talk to her how horrible is that? oh well, I really admire you and wish you luck with your father and that everything goes well.
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CarlyJessie, I loved your poem. It really hit home with me. I'm going to share it with my little sister. We both have been feeling very stressed about our family life and only in the past couple months have started to talk to each other about it, I feel this poem will bring us closer, and help us express our feelings. Thanks Jessie
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BenI read your poem, and it brought tears to my eyes. I haven't been through the things you have, I have a wonderful Dad! I can't believe there is a man, make that many men, that would treat their Daughters like this! Jessie! Keep your head up! You have to realize, you are beautiful! I'm not talkin bout looks, (although I'm sure your fine in that area also) But, you shine in your own way! Don't worry about being Popular! I'm sorry, sorry that I can't put into words, what I'm trying to say. I'm sorry you have a father instead of a loving Dad. keep up the good work with your writing, I wish I could express my feelings as good as you do!
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KellyI think this is a really good poem. And is very true for many families alike.
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ChrisI can relate to this poem rather easily. My dad was the same way with me. Always bragging on about my older brother and not even mentioning he had another son or any of the things that he had accomplished. Growing the form of raising me on his part was "Go ask your mother." He told me my friends were freaks and losers and I was a loser myself. Never did I recieve any praise from him. We're better than them though, they'll see what they've missed someday and regret the treatment they gave us.
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shantaejessie this is a heart touching poem its just makes me realize how much i appreciate what my dad does for me and i am so sorry for how your dad treats you and when you say you aint popular or pretty or smart etc. well in your own way you are popular you dont have to have everybody like you just as long as you have your own friends then you are popular in yor own way and just cause no body else thinks your pretty dosent mean you arent its just what you think and how you feel about your self so dont put your self down k well i really love your poem i was well dont good thinking
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NicoleWoW.
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randiHey, i think it's totally awesome that you can express your feelings the way you do. i've been through it all, and i can tell you it's not easy. keep up writing this way, and you can make it big. good job!:)
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DanyellAwww It's so Nice!!!
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TabithaThis poem is truly from the heart. You are a wonderful poet! Keep up the good work and hold on to faith!
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EsmeI read this very carefully. I like it so much that I read it more then five times. It's because it reminded me about my cousin. All those things that I saw and she told me. I love this poem.
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BethPerfectly said
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